Why??? :(

WHY!?!?!?!

Why is it with us women we always fall for the bad ones :(. Why is it that we always end up thinking more about the asses in our lives then the sweethearts that have made us smile and feel so beautiful? 

I feel like an idiot at the time. I've found this beautiful man who is everything a women could want. Sweet, understanding, and romantic. Yet, even with him in my life I keep thinking about another boy. A boy who is not worth it at all. An ass of a man and nothing compared to the man I have now. 

I keep dreaming that idiot!! I know it may mean something else, but just the fact that I dream him aggravates me! He isn't worth my time let alone my thoughts....I know my dreams maybe trying to tell me something, but I don't want to even think of him, let alone think of him. I hope this ends soon :(.

I'm drunk at the moment too :p

I HATE YOU ASS!!! 

Ze Best Friend :D

And here is my Besty!!!! :D 

None other then the Kyle! 

He's been my friend for as long as I can remember! We're like sister ;D. Just from a different whom.....and spermy :D. Hehe! Well, he and I are about as awesome as they come. We can entertain ourselves with about nothing and enjoy some of the weirdest shit :p. I remember once him and I were watching some videos on youtube about farts. Holy crap did we laugh :). Yeah, now that's something you can't do with just anybody :p. 

He is also the sweetest person I know. I can tell him all my secrets and know that none of them will ever leave his lips. I wish we were 21 so we could go to Vegas and have a fucking fun time watching strippers and getting drunk on the strip. 

No matter what happens to us as we began the journey of so called "adulthood" I know that he and I will always be to tighter then tight. We'll be friends till the day we are both shitting in diapers in some retirement home. 

I love you man!!

My Compatibility :p

Right here

Kristen!! :D

One of my besties, Kristen got her license a few days ago :D. I was so happy for her! I feel so proud of her. She is an amazing women, but for some reason not many people can or want to see it. It makes me mad when people underestimate her ability, because I know what she is capable of. I know the great things that she can and will contribute to this chaotic world! She is like a small flame waiting to be fired up to light the darkness around. 

Someday everyone will see what an incredible person she is and they will see how much they have wronged her. I want to see all those who thought that she was nothing more then a imperfect failer to bite their tongues when they see the great things she makes happen. I want them to be green with envy knowing they could never even come close to the greatness she will be. 

I'll always be your friend Kristen. And always try my best to be there for you :D.

LOVE YOU

The Other Boy

My heart feels like a sack of bricks right now, too heavy for it's own good.

Today I was talking to this boy I had a past fling with. The fling came at a cost of practically losing one of my best friends (or what I thought was a best friend). While I was talking to him all those old feeling came rushing back and all I could think about was him. I felt bad because my current boy totally left my mind at that moment. I don't know what this means! I don't want to have feelings for the other boy! He crushed my heart and still continues to do it to this day. I feel like crying at times, because I feel so stupid for even letting him get so into my mind. 

I want nothing more then to forget any kind of feelings I ever had for the other boy, but it seems impossible. He even moved and yet it seems like he'll be in my heart and mind forever. I want to be able to focus completely on my current boy. I want to be able to look at him and not think of the other.  I want to be happy with a boy that wouldn't hurt me and actually is with me for me and not what I can give.

Oh how I hope that day comes soon!!

The Boy

I know, I know I'm writing a blog about a boy. Silly teenage girl and her childish romances :p.  But yes I will continue. As of (not sure) 2 month I've been seeing this new guy. An interesting fellow so to say. Much different then the guys I'm usually confronted with.

However this change has seemed to work quite in an odd way. He's become something he wasn't meant to, to me. I thought that maybe I'd just go out with to kill time and all this and that, but for some reason that mind set has changed. 

I could go weeks without seeing him no problem. I could not talk to him forever and no problem. But now its almost impossible. I think about him all the time. I see him all the time and it's scaring me so much. I don't want to get attached. I don't want to be let down like so many time before. I don't know what to do. I know I don't love him, but every time I'm around him I feel happy, warm, peaceful. It is just so odd. I really am so confused :p

Metro Station!

I'm sure everyone by now knows who Metro Station is and all that :p. They are hugely what I'd expect any hardcore person to call "a little gay emo band" but they have captured my heart :D. I love almost all of their songs and know must of the lyrics to them.

I don't even mind that one of the singers is sibling to that horrid creature named Miley Cyrus. God I could fling that idiotic dip-shit down a long flight of stairs. No kidding I hate her. 

But enough about that mole of a girl. This band is totally addictive. One of my friends is completely in love with them now, after I played him a few songs while on a camping trip. They are just that catchy. It's kind of scary :p. Hehehe! 

Just wanted to say that are pretty cool and worth checking out sometime :D.